Of irresponsibly generous men

Why would a man buy a woman a phone worth Ksh 64,000, fly her to the Coast, book her into one of the poshier and swankier hotels in the Mombasa for a weekend before flying her back to Nairobi, and they are not even dating? Just a random woman who happens to be young, beautiful and available for the weekend. As the Twitter proverb says, there is nothing more expensive than a Nairobian woman who is free and available for the weekend. Boy, she will drain you.

If it is your girlfriend, it will be suitable. If a wife, perfectly acceptable. If a mistress, understandable. But we are talking about those impulsively lustful moments whereby a man just feels overly excited by a young woman and he has no content in his head to match the calculating skills of the woman, he opts to unfailing cash stunt.

A line like, ‘hey let’s fly down to Malindi for a weekend of…’ has and will always worked.

The really culprits are the overpaid yuppies whose paycheck is enough to buy a second hand car that is in good condition. Mostly they are bosses who target junior female employees hankering after a quick promotion or enough cash to move into a better neighbourhood preferably in Lang’ata or South B/C. They equally go after prettier women who are selling clothes in stalls and waitresses in high end restaurants. I am talking about the random nature of their choices and their indiscriminate spending of cash.

They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Now these women have decided to help separate the fool from his money. To them, sleeping around in exchange of electronic gifts, rent and money is not a bigger deal. They are not call girls. They are perfectly normal women, educated no less, with jobs-though not well paying-or in businesses that do not rake in as much as they would wish. OK, let us call them material girls with a thing for glamorous things.

They have ambition. They know what it takes; going for high-end salons and coming out with a killer look. Most of the time they are blessed with suitable physical features that meet the fiscal indiscretions of men who can’t see the absurdity of paying Ksh 20,000 for a manicure and pedicure in the CBD. With her money, Kenyatta market is never too far for her salon affairs. But since these men can be blackmailed into paying the bills, why not pursue the options of a renowned salon in town. Ashleys maybe.

Resultantly, you have women driving vehicles given to them as gifts. You have women drinking whiskeys that are in the sections of supermarkets that few mortals bother to look up their prices. Or better still they have developed a taste for brewed beer, coffee and tea. When a woman starts saying things like brewed coffee or beer, I go bonkers. I know I am dealing with a plastic thing. Probably she comes from the long line of an ancestry that has dwelt in plastic business, you know…

Let us examine these men. Among the male circles it is rightly presumed that only men who are desperately incapable of seducing women who opt to splash the money in order to get the woman they want. A man with enough intellect and humour will probably spend less. But there are men who are endowed with neither intellect nor humour. They are so boring; you can feel your hair grow listening to them. So boring, time stops when you are with them. But nature in its random act of balancing has decided to give them money.

So with the cash, they have the best head start that works 95%, actually 99% of the time. If in a bar, they can start by sending some shots of Sambuca, or any other equally good rum. These men just live to fulfill the newly acquired epicurean tastes of these women. To them they are constantly dangling the carrot of money and the gifts. In one Pavlovian move they have reconditioned these women to a life of affluence at a relatively young age.

Resultantly, you have a 25 year old woman who came from somewhere in the countryside who cannot travel by bus to the country side anymore, it is either flying or driving an expensive ride. She cannot touch any other phone, if it is not a pricey smart phone, not Android but iPhone. Whatever they say about snob appeal? They cannot live in Eastlands (it is unsafe). They cannot drink normal beers or soft commonly known drinks; they have developed a peculiar taste for unpronounceable drinks that come from France or Eastern Europe. ‘They work for them, always.’

Come on, men ought to be wiser than that. Spending on a woman is alright. Spoiling a woman you fancy and dating is the order of nature. What defeats logic is buying every other woman who satiates your carnal appetite an expensive gift just to have her somewhere in the horizon just in case the thirst just resurfaces.

These ends up creating an imbalance in the dating scene, disturbing the equilibrium for many broke men who can afford a taxi but don’t own a car. You might not see the really damage you are doing to everyone connected to this woman or you for that matter. You now have extremely young women who have taken to a life far beyond their means and inadvertently being roped into prostitution or being third rate mistresses in order to sustain their lives.

Before you opt to buy that car for her, think twice whether she is worth. Think again if there is a cousin somewhere who might benefit if you pay for her or his college fee. Invest in something intellectual and charisma, after all women are not only after money. Who knows, maybe you are helping her keep her official boyfriend with your M-PESA remittances.

For one fact of life remains, a man who spends the most on a woman occupies the lowest possible rung in her life and her many men. Just like he is using her sexually, to her the man is just an ATM. There ought to be a balance.

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11 thoughts on “Of irresponsibly generous men

  1. hahaha!! Nice one, money is a cockblocker when it comes to guys ‘stretching beyond their normal lanes’… Common sense should hit such guys with no mercy.

  2. In the 21st century money has become the new god…while too little is heartbreaking,many cannot manage too much money….nyce one Sila

  3. Haha, this one: ‘A man with enough intellect and humour will probably spend less. But there are men who are endowed with neither intellect nor humour. They are so boring; you can feel your hair grow listening to them. So boring, time stops when you are with them. But nature in its random act of balancing has decided to give them money.’

    I’d rather walk with my ‘kabamberries’ than listen to my hair grow. An intellectual/humorous guy’s simple and not so dear but genuine gifts have the benefit of ‘attachment’ and vice versa.

  4. I think that everything composed made a ton of sense.

    However, think about this, what if you were to create a awesome post title?
    I am not suggesting your content is not good.

    , however suppose you added a post title that grabbed folk’s attention? I mean Of irresponsibly generous men Nyanchwani’s Blog is kinda boring.
    You should glance at Yahoo’s front page and watch how they write news headlines to get viewers to open the links. You might try adding a video or a pic or two to grab people interested about everything’ve written.
    Just my opinion, it could bring your blog a
    little bit more interesting.

  5. Just when i was about to splash money on some undeserving young mama, thank God for little mercies, i read this post just in time.

  6. The only place where sense and humour find a meeting place n’ it goes without say tht i personally lack the right adjectectives to best describe hw expressive u cn get,kudoz bruh,

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