In my dating escapades, I have encountered numerous categories of women. I must set the record straight from the get-go that I am not the Casanova-in-chief, but I have had my fair share at the game of seduction. I have encountered really gorgeous women who proved out of my league and those who could buy my stories were either too spent, or had one fatal flaw that you pressed skip as soon as you learnt about it. I have dated average looking chicks, every so often, truth be said the world is full of average men and women. And like any man of my age, I have seen my days with women who were not exactly hot and my friends didn’t hide their disappointment or hesitation either. On the same note, I know I have been that not-so-handsome dude to many chicks.
Since most of the time, we mostly deal with average women, I have come to gather and appreciate they can easily be the most complicated lot to date. If you thought extremely beautiful women are a handful, then you better steer clear of the average woman who can be decidedly sticky.
For starters, to their credit average women sometimes have some of the most interesting body parts. The most memorable boobs I have laid my eyes on were from a chick with the most average face. Some of the most well-formed hips or bottoms are mostly from averagely looking women. It is called nature’s balancing act. Just pick any lady randomly with the best sitting apparatus and I bet, you cannot write home much about their faces or vice-versa. And I have enough anecdotal evidence that average looking women leash out some really outstanding performance in bed, mostly as a compensatory factor.
Any man past 24 can tell you that the best sex they ever had didn’t come from a chick with a face of Angelina Jolie. Average looking women normally have the fatal problem of overestimating their beauty and firm believers of makeup. Hence those scary eye shadows and glaringly scary lip glosses inside Nakumatt Lifestyle on a Friday Evening. As for female shoes, I have a specific, inexplicable hatred towards them.
Average women. They are the most sticky and demanding. If you thought a beautiful woman obsessed with her beauty the most tragic thing, then you have not really met a possessive, nagging average chick. Believe you me. Ever noticed that average chicks are twice likely to call you all manner of sweet nothings as soon as the first shag is done?
Average chicks have the tendencies of leaving behind their panties and other paraphernalia in your pad to announce their presence for any woman the man might try to bring home. Average chicks know a thing or two about detecting female presence during their absence. I have had hair strands extracted from the wooden pillar of the bed and questioned the whole night.
Average women have these thing of putting demands, sanctions and all manner of curfews on their men, often to appalling levels. You can’t keep them waiting, but she can keep you. You must always keep part of your bargain. She is under no obligation to fulfill her end of expectations. They demand gifts. They have biological reactions to inanimate objects like a piece of card with banal and hackney words sprayed on it. They have hormonal excitement if you can get them flowers. They believe in love, even when all a man wanted was shag on the go.
If you want to date an average chick, be careful what you say. They are like the police and the legal system, ‘be careful what you say or else it will be used against you in a court of law.’ They are the type that demands full commitment before they can part with their ‘you know what’. You must go through the rigourous courtship rituals; buy the coffees, take her out for dinner, deliver pizza, sambaza her airtime and all manner of gifts in order to get her to the designated destination: Your bed. The preconditions you must first go through are nerve wracking and men give up pretty fast, because they are not worth the chase, quite often.
Quite understandably all these necessities that precede the sex are meant to weed out the jokers. Any man who quits was primarily after sex. Quite strangely, even in this era of cheap and casual sex from every quarter, we have a bunch of average chicks still living under the illusion that relationships are tenable. It gives hopeless romantics like yours truly some hope, but problem is that these women get cheated one time too many and they give up on their ideals.
And nothing like an average woman who has let it go. It is a biological security backup on the women’s part to ensure that no man takes them for a ride, unless, they consent. But most average women, more so teetotalers can really cling to their beliefs. If only their efforts would be rewarded suitably by a man who doesn’t think monogamy is the capital city of Mongolia.
While they do that, any man who has dealt with women long enough will know which side of his bread is buttered and can utter just anything, if only to get laid. When they stick around and tie the man, the men will always forage for it elsewhere.
As a certified bachelor now, my house has been turned into a mating ground by my friends in stable relationships or even married. Their partners are average to say the least but they live under the illusion that they are the only women in their (my friends’) world and anytime I’m in their presence and they are talking, nagging like the own the men, I can’t help but sympathize.
Many women would better understand their potential rather than exaggerating their looks and all aspects that matter in the game of seduction. The selfish desire of the man is always to satiate his pelvic thirst and go. Your selfish desire is to keep him. You must meet somewhere. Men like politicians know how to measure their words in order to get laid. The best way of measuring a man’s commitment is after the first shag. If he comes back for more, you can be sure, he must have been impressed. You can start dangling the carrot. It is far much better, than being lied to and he walking casually like there was never anything going on? Equally scaring him away by numerous senseless demands can be costly for this can scare the good man away unnecessarily.
But may be women have only their sexuality to dangle…MAYBE